Funny insult of the week..

" If you wanna get Eyore pregnant, cum on her feet and let the flies do the rest "... This became even funnier after it was discovered that Eyores toad has a foot fetish.. I dont care who you are.. Thats some funny shit right there..


I downloaded a hidden meaning text translator..

Lets try this out..I'll enter the text that Eyore and her Toad posted in MY virginia chatroom on 11/12/2009 and see what happens after the conversion.. < Start program >
Eyore4129: Zeeke I know i'm repulsive and ugly but i really like you
Eyore4129: I want you to come fuck me in the ass
Eyore4129: I'm sad, it makes me sad that you ignore me
Eyore4129: I'm soooooooooooooooo lonely
Eyore4129: come fuck me in the ass
Eyore4129: i'm waiting
Eyore4129: fuck me like the whore i am
Eyore4129: you can abuse my anus
Eyore4129: you know i'm submissive you can do anything to me
Eyore4129: its sad
Eyore4129: sad I'm sad that you wont give me the time of day
Eyore4129: i get stuck with dickless idiots like jnr
Eyore4129: I cant speak up, he changes my oil for free because he thinks hes got a shot at getting my slop hole
Eyore4129: hes a dickless worm
Eyore4129: just like i thought he was
Eyore4129: you can boot me
Eyore4129: come on zeeke, i need it bad
Eyore4129: dont make me beg
Eyore4129: hey joey you dickless worm
Eyore4129: i have begged zeeke to fuck me in the ass
Jnr60johnson: in the anus ?
Eyore4129: I have such a crush on him
Jnr60johnson: who do you wanna fuck, zeek?
Eyore4129: zeek
Eyore4129: yes
Jnr60johnson: o ok can i hide in the closet and jackoff while hes banging you ?
Eyore4129: sad huh??
Eyore4129: i swear that's so hot when you hide in there
Jnr60johnson: well its a good way to get nice ass shots of him
Eyore4129: he needs to have me in his life
Eyore4129: or a women like me to give him herpes
Jnr60johnson: i need to go to sleep and dream of zeeke banging you in the ass
Eyore4129: so do i
Jnr60johnson: later hon enjoy
Jnr60johnson: (_o_)
Eyore4129: nite nite
This is amazing.. It almost makes Eyore and her Toad entertaining.. I cant wait to use it again..


We have a winner ..

The cartoon beaver won in a tight race.. Tied for second was a fat bloated Tony Orlando and A dogs nutsack.. 3rd place went to the drunken indian from F troop and 4th place went to some gay hand dancer on youtube wearing a tutu..


What ever happened to ole Bosco ?

Bosco is a sad story.. After years of providing sexual favors for his master he got cancer and had to be put down.. Hes now the Thursday lunch special at Chi's Korean lunch corner.. Kung Pao Dog..I bet with all that peanut butter he licked off his owners nutsack over the years they didnt even have to add peanuts .. Poor Poor Bosco..


Who Does Takoma Most Resemble ?

I've conducted an extensive web search using state of the art facial recognition technology.. 3 results were returned.. A groundhog.. A cartoon beaver or Theodore Chipmunk.. I see aspects of all 3 in Takomas picture.. Hes got the beedy little eyes of the groundhog, The buckteeth of the beaver and he's got the headshape of Theodore Chipmunk.. I'll leave it up to Ask Zeeke readers to decide and post the results later.. You can be part of this super scientific survey by voting in the comments section..


Why has Takoma turned into a crazed stalker ?

Takoma hasnt been right since he got busted out for claiming he currently worked at a prison that closed in 2002.. Instead of blaming himself for the situation he's chosen to blame the people who caught him in the lie.. He's got some sort of halfassed revenge thing going on but his approach has left him appearing mentally deranged and unstable.. All that aside I think the reason he stalks me is that he contracted the GAY VIRUS and wants to taste my penis..