2/28/09

Tips on calling someone out..

Recent events prompted me to share tips on the manly art of calling someone out .. First.. Dont use a fat wheelchair bound gimp as a mouthpiece.. Her image suffered enough over wishing her kid dead, She didnt need more bad JU-JU .. Second.. Dont toot your own horn and believe someone is fearful just because you think he wont show up. Third .. If the guy you call out is more than 5 times smarter than you be careful, He might be setting you up .. Fourth and most importantly, If you call someone out.. SHOW UP at the place and time YOU specified or you end up looking like a big fat pussy .. In conclusion, Zeeke doesnt condone this type of behavior .. If a font makes you angry enough to engage in a physical confrontation its time to evaluate where life went wrong and look into buying a penis enlargement pump to correct certain SHORT comings which causes your mouth to write checks you cant cash..

2/17/09

Can you qualify implying that Pepper is a whore ?

Shame on you for not having 100% confidence in Zeeke .. I give so much back to my readers and I feel hurt and insulted that I'm being put in the position to qualify my words.. Would newspaper articles bearing names and criminal activitiy be enough to validate my implication that Pepper is indeed a whore ? If you dont trust me maybe you will trust the Dumbass Daily who picked it up and made it a featured story.... If you cant trust Zeeke or a fine literary publication like the Dumbass Daily to shine the light of truth, Who can you trust ? I'm so disheartened and distraught over this outrageous character assination opon my font that I'm penalizing ALL readers by making you do this investigation all by yourselves.. If you Google search.. Prostitute, Craigslist, Pregnant and Arrest, You will find numerous stories about Diane Cromwell and her pimp husband that more than qualify my statement and will restore Zeekes character and integrity to the Lincolnish standards I once enjoyed amongst my many fans ..

2/16/09

SCAM ALERT ( Dont give the whore a dime )

I feel its my civic duty and moral obligation to point out certain individuals who's felonious activities show them to be less than model citizens.. One such online predator who resurfaces from time to time like a FESTERING HERPES CANKER is a vile whore named Pepper.. Uber reliable sources have informed me that shes back and trying to bilk money from people so she can see a dentist.. Since her cover is blown she may change her story but her intention is to make you pity her and send money.. Dont become her next victim ..

2/15/09

What is the dumbest thing you saw posted this week ?

I see so many dumb things posted that it all becomes a blur.. I would have to say when the toothless trucker posted that he took his dog as a 10,000 dollar tax write off by claiming its a security system for his rig would have to take top honors .. I cant wait til that turd floats by the IRS red flag department..

2/14/09

My girl says she thinks Valentines Day is stupid.. Should I still get her a gift ?

ITS A TRAP... Dont fall into it.. If you dont get her anything, Condsider yourself cut-off until at least Mothers Day..

2/11/09

Should engaged men be sending flowers to women they meet in chatrooms ?

I guess if you are "fishing" because your old lady is ready to set your junk on the curb because you cant stay out of AOL drama, Its understandable but not excusable.. If you use the fiances credit card to purchase the flowers it adds a certian DUMBASS element to the situation that makes it especially funny to people looking in .. Its just NOT a cool thing to do.. EVER..

2/5/09

Why do you think paying someone to piss thru my mailslot is funny ?

Its not only funny its part of my economic stimulus plan... We can save our nations struggling economy by paying A third party 50 bucks a pop to piss thru mailslots of people we dont like.. We have a duty as Americans to do everything humanly possible to help get us out of the current economic downturn and I'm willing to do my part .. In fact.. I'm feeling pretty yankee doodle dandy, So I'll make it 75. .. Never let it be said that Zeeke isnt a good American..

2/3/09

Did Bonnie see her shadow on Groundhog Day ?

That vile creature doesnt have a shadow anymore... Last year on Groundhog day they yanked her out of the cave at sunrise, She saw her shadow and swore it was part of some big internet conspiracy that was out to destroy her life... She totally Wretched Out, Threw acid on it , Threatened it with legal action, Dialed 911 to report a crime, Blogged it, Made a clone name and posted a bunch of lies in a chatroom and then devoted her life to searching the internet for dirt to use against it.. Her poor shadow realized it was a victim of her paranoid delusions so it ran away and vowed never to return ..

2/2/09

I browse personal ads and see the letters BBW, What does it mean ?

Ugh .. Personal adds ? Shame on you.. Women who place those ads show up for the first date in a moving van.. The term BBW means "Big Beefy Woman".. I guess if you are hardup and only looking to "bury the bone" until someone worthwhile comes along, Pounding a Portly Princess with the meat hammer would be a viable alternative to hand lotion and a sandwich bag.. One suggestion though Always unscrew the lightbulbs before she removes her clothes.. That way you dont risk blindness if someone flips on a light switch..

2/1/09

Why havent you answered my question ?

Its simple.. The question wasnt "Zeeke Worthy".. Plus I dont translate HICKTARD So I'm not even sure what you were trying to ask me anyway.... If the question wasnt sent to me in email form, It likely would have been written in blue crayon on the the flap of a twinkie box.. I'm sure that 5th grade education has served you well for things like creating an AOL accounts or displaying mindless "tags" on a user profile but it does little to help you turn a simple thought or idea into A semi intelligent question.. Keep trying though.. Its good for my Ego ..