5/27/10

Brandine Wilson's Out Of The Closet ( finally )


After years of hiding behind religion Brandine Wilson is finally out of the closet.. It ends years of speculation and coverups and allows him/her to live the lifestyle he was born to pursue.. The poor BASTARD had no chance in life as a man.. A psychotic mother and a very unstable section 8 upbringing with no father around was more than enough reason for him to decide living life as a woman would better suit his needs.. Years of seeing homeless men abuse his mothers mouth for Kools planted the seed in his mind that being a little cocksucker was his destiny.. Now that he's out of the closet he can quit his job as a custodian at his church because he doesnt have to sneak around and lick toilets searching for a stain that might be manly body fluid.. Sure he will still enjoy the gloryhole he operates at the gas station but now Braidine can approach it with a renewed vigor and exitement.. You Go forward in life brandine and be the best cocksucking little BASTARD you can possibly be ..

5/24/10

Zeeke Announces A New Blog

I'm creating a Trucker's blog.. It will be a paysite and contain tips on childcare, Cooking, helpful gardening advice and random pieces written by illiterate stooges.. I don't have a name yet but I promise it will be out by Memorial day 2010.. OK.. I lied.. That's the dumbest fucking thing I've ever heard in my life.. Why on earth would truckers care about any of that shit ? A truckers life consists of hours of mind numbing boredom broken up by thinking they may have caught a glimpse of a boob while being passed by a female motorist at 80 MPH and chucking piss filled plastic bottles out of windows at highway speed.. Only a total dimwit like Toothless Bob would be stupid enough to imagine slimeball truckers would actually pay good money to read that senseless crap.. Sometimes the sheer magnitude of Bob's stupidity boggles the mind..

5/23/10

First Day of Research Uncovered The Horror's of Zeeke Hate Causing Severe Facial Deformity


The results of my super scientific study linking Zeeke hate and severe facial deformity are in and I am ready offer the following hypothesis.. Zeeke hate does indeed cause severe facial droop.. In Fact.. This subject has suffered severe facial droop on both sides of her face as well as jowl and neck bloating which suggests the disease may be even more destructive than earlier anticipated.. My heart goes out to those suffering from this horrible Zeeke related facial deformity and as a gesture of good faith I will offer free rolls of scotch tape so sufferers can tape that shit back up and partially restore the deformed facial features to A pre-Zeeke hate condition.. I'm sorry but the tape will only repair the droop, It wont fix chronic ugly or the mental retardation associated with the test subjects but it may stop small children from running away from them in shopping malls screaming.. "Mommy, I just SEEN a monster" and allow them to lead semi-normal lives as delusional internet buttdarts..

5/22/10

Health Risks Associated With Zeeke Hate



What do you see in those 2 pictures ? No.. I mean aside from 2 ugly old beatdown homosexual men.. Look at the left half of each face and compare it to the right.. Zeeke hate has caused both individuals severe left side facial droop.. It's been well documented that Zeeke Hate causes mental illness and retardation but it appears there may be physical consequences of it as well.. I suspect anger and hate manifested itself into a sudden rise in blood pressure causing severe eye twitching leading to a series of mini strokes and finally to left side facial paralysis.. The damage is so severe on the old gurlyfag's face that within a year his eye will be at the corner of his mouth and he wont be able to drink without getting his shirt wet from dribbling.. As A public service I will be contacting A medical research facility and have the disease studied and documented in the near future.. I will suggest the name "Zeekehateitis" and offer any assistance I can to study this funny yet severe self inflicted disease..

5/21/10

Ughhh... They Didn't Listen..


Blogging is a lot like entering the special olympics, Even if you win you are still a tard.. With that being said.. I dont understand why the other blogtards are making things so complicated to read a blog.. Redirection, Passwords, ISP trackers, Virus', special invitations.. God only knows what you will get when you click the links.. If I take 5 minutes of my day to post a few words the object is for people to read it and laugh without hassles or headaches and not frustrate readers because I need to feed my ego and know who was peeking.. No blog is worth the risk of damaging a computer yet they make it seem like its a real possibility.. I know for a fact the other blogs lost followers when it was discovered that ISP's were being tracked and they lost even more readers dicking people around with invitation's and passwords.. When I post on Ask Zeeke part of the humor is knowing the dumbasses I write about will read it and be offended.. If I made it selective it wouldn't reach nearly as many people so what's the point ? You may be asking yourself why I added a picture of Toothless Bob to this post and the answer is simple.. It's a hideous picture that I'm sure he doesnt want people to see and when Bob see's it he will swallow his false teeth and call everyone in his phone directory.. If I made Ask Zeeke private he wouldn't even know the picture was posted but since I welcome all readers without the fear of invading anyones privacy, getting a virus or wondering what hoops they have to jump thru today to view the blog.. I know he will see it and be pooping false teeth by noon..

5/19/10

Toothless Bob and Whore Maddy Hit The Beach ?


Personally I'm not buying this photo.. I think it's fake!.. However Fat Angie sunning herself in the background does add to the pictures authenticity and it is a fair representation of Bob and Maddy's relationship, So who knows ?

5/16/10

Another Funny Moment At Butter's Expense..

The only thing funnier than watching Butter sucking everyones ass trying to be part of the group is watching Butter sucking everyones ass trying to be part of the group and being attacked by Toothless Bob.. The room was grooving on Zeeke hate and suddenly Toothless Bob and ButterPig are going at it like a coupla tard kids fighting over the last loot bag at a Chuckee Cheese birthday party.. Beckie laughingly threatened to bolt Bob and ease the situation but everyone knows that wont happen and it just adds to the hilarity when Butter believes she matters enough for Beckie to bolt the fat toothless trucker.. Wake up Butter.. She wont bolt Bob because you are being insulted.. You have shown yourself to be an ass kissing shit for brains backstabbing fence jumping hypocrite who will turn on a dime.. Hey I know, The next time Bob attacks, Get really pissed off and tell everyone you are going to start a new room because you are tired of the BS and sit there alone until you realize no one gives a shit that you are offended and are forced to return and soak up the humiliation like a big fat crippled sponge.. Oh right, You've done that before.. By the way, How stupid did that make you feel ?

5/13/10

I Thought Everyone Knew ?

I read a discussion in the Super Secret Room about comments posted on Ask Zeeke.. Evidently there are a few geriatric nincompoops in the old room who don't understand that when you see 25 comments pop up they all came from yours truly.. I have stated this on many occasions and even wrote a feature about how I wouldn't allow many comments so I don't understand why the old gurlyfag and his butt buddy blog owner pal have turned it into a huge conspiracy theory or an attempt by me to defraud anyone.. Do they really repost my stuff with a play by play analysis searching for deep hidden meanings ? Thats seriously GAY ! Ok so.. We see a funny picture of Fat Angie posted, I will show you how I make the Zeeke comment magic happen..

5/11/10

SvaPam, She So Stumpy !


Here's another prime example of a time ravaged old woman imagining herself to be attractive and desireable.. She has sent this candid shot out to many late night peter rubbin' romeos hoping one will make the 5 hour drive and throw her some manmeat.. My best advice is for her to call the Discovery channel and get in touch with the "swamp loggers" crew.. They know how to deal with old smelly wet rotten stumps !

5/10/10

Poor Redskytard


As if being caught up in more "he said, she said" drama with MVM wasn't bad enough for the headless fatgurl she was forced to endure the torture of watching Beckie posting openly that I behaved as a perfect gentleman whenever she visited me at the river shack.. I can understand Redskytards personal anger over the situation that unfolded yesterday.. How dare someone who has actually met me and shared personal experiences ruin months of lies, rumors and innuendo by posting a few simple truths, IT'S AN OUTRAGE ! I've told you dumbasses that the demonization of Zeeke is a dangerous road that only leads to self destruction and misery.. I think this makes the score Zeeke five million, hapless retards zero..

5/9/10

How Do You Repair A Blow Up Love Doll ?

Last night as Takoma plugged in the airpump and was preparing for a night of hot sex with his girlfriend "Karen" he noticed that she wasn't holding air.. If anyone knows how to repair a cheap vinyl blow up love doll please pass that info along to him at Takoma9270@aol.com Thank You for helping..

5/8/10

Are you dating Cindy ?

I've had several friends who still use the old room email me and ask that question.. I have answered the emails because I have personal ties to them and are entitled to know if I'm dating anyone or not.. I will neither confirm nor deny these persistant rumors in a public forum simply because its not anyone's business and quite frankly I'm not sure why anyone would really care.. Oh right, Because ZEEKE is the center of the universe!..

5/7/10

OOPS..

Once again Takoma's pea sized brain left someone flappin in the wind.. "Takoma9270: I was looking at Chris's blog this morning, he really cracks me up".. Hepzilla and Redskytard made the same error refering to the "Hapless blog" last week.. I guess the old gurlyfag needs friends who are capable of keeping a secret..

5/6/10

Meanwhile Back In Reality..

This morning Sunnie and Padur were involved in a mind numbingly dull chat about people lacking class while at the same time MzTeach was discussing her thongs and asking Rixroost to come over and inseminate her.. The teacher spelled it INSEMENATE which just added to the humor of the whole situation.. Sunnie was 100% right and if she wasn't busy preaching the gospel she would have seen a great example of classless going on right under her nose.. That's a double TSK !

A Vintage Friday

The band Vintage will be playing at Perry's in Odenton Friday night.. Max's band "off the hook" will be playing in Crofton Saturday night.. Spineless bush hiding crazed stalkers please make necessary adjustments because I wont be at Remingtons Saturday night this week.. There I go hiding in plain sight again..

5/5/10

Because Zeeke Cares..

Since the old Maryland room has become a graveyard I've decided to unbolt a few of the less annoying retards and allow them back in my room.. The ejection list went from 83 to 77.. Were you one of the lucky ones ? If you didn't make the cut it's OK.. You have hours and hours of "I Hate Zombie" chat awaiting you in the old room.. Who knows you might get lucky and see Bonnie and the old gurlyfag discussing the pro's and con's of household bleach or the fine art of dishwashing.. Wouldn't that be thrilling ? Goodluck and I hope to see you soon.. Zeeke

5/4/10

Zombies Rule, Sheeple Drool


Zombies eat brains, Sheeple have nothing to fear..

5/2/10

Remember When ?




Remember when Team Toothless trotted out the bikini picture of Merry and pretended she was a hottie and later it was discovered she really looked like a big fat sloppy buddah ? GOOD TIMES !

5/1/10

Whats The Next Trend In Hats ?


I'm thinking totally retro.. Like 1790 retro.. A hat should make a statement about the person who wears it.. Like this one that Jonny "welfare" Rico is wearing.. That hat makes a bold statement.. He's telling the world.. " laugh at me, I'm a big fat douchebag "